Sometimes
by TwistedSunshine
Summary: PeytonNathan. Or as I like to call it, Neyton. Peyton reflects on her relationship with Nathan, and realizes that sometimes, it all come down to your first love. Please Read!


Author's Note: Hey all! Okay, let me explain this thing. Peyton has made the decision to break off all ties with Lucas, romantically. She doesn't want to risk her friendship with Brooke. Nathan and Haley have broken up, mutually, because their relationship was too complicated and they didn't feel like they were meant for each other. Parings are: P/N and maybe a little L/H. Enjoy. Please review, 'cause this is the first story I've ever posted.  
  
* Sometimes, in Tree Hill, it rained. It wasn't often, but it happened. Clouds would roll in, the air would change, and the sky's would open up and release torrential rainfall. She loved it.  
  
Peyton would sit on the window seat in her room and just watch the rain. Occasionally she would draw, but most of the time she would just watch. She sighed. Things had gotten so complicated, especially with Lucas. Brooke wouldn't even look at her anymore, and Peyton couldn't blame her. Ever since they were kids, and Brooke had come over every single day after school, they had sworn never to let a guy come between them. Peyton had betrayed Brooke in the worst possible way. So, she had decided, she would let Lucas go. She wouldn't pine after him from afar, or cry because they couldn't be together. That pat of her life was over. What surprised her the most was that she wasn't that upset. She felt like she should be hurting more, like this should be tearing her apart, but it wasn't. Actually, she was relieved.  
  
What her and Lucas had was perfect. Or at least, it should have been. They liked the same bands, they read the same books, Christ, her father even liked him. But something never seemed right. They were so at ease around each other. It wasn't as if Peyton didn't love him, she did. She just didn't know if she had truly been in love with him. For some reason, it seemed that all their pseudo relationship had done was make her cry. Not that crying over one of the Scott brothers was new to her.  
  
She remembered dark eyes that could make her tremble. All he'd had to do was look at her and she'd melt. She remembered full lips, hot, so hot, that they burned her skin, and strong hands that made her feel like she was made out of porcelain. She remembered hard abs and soft skin, sliding against her and pressing her into the bed. She remembered his reassuring weight, and how he used to whisper sweet nothings into her ears, making her smile into the dark.  
  
She remembered mood swings and angry yelling. Passionate arguing and even more passionate lovemaking. She knew his body better than she knew her own. She remembered hot, frustrated, desperate kissing in the dark. Broken lamps, overturned tables, the frenzied removal of clothing, all because they couldn't keep their hands off of each other. They'd both had the bruises to prove it. God, he was beautiful. So painfully beautiful.  
  
Their relationship hadn't been as complicated as it had seemed. To some it hadn't seemed complicated at all. The head cheerleader and the star basketball player, what could be more natural? It hadn't been about that at all. When they were together it wasn't about basketball or cheerleading, or anything else except the two of them. They needed each other.  
  
Some people though that he treated her terribly. And he did, in a way. But she understood. Most of the time she welcomed it. She wanted to help him. She knew that he needed to do it, at least if he was as broken as he was. She knew that he needed someone in his life that would love him unconditionally, and she wanted to be that person. Dan put so much pressure on him. He always had. Peyton didn't believe in hating people, her mother had taught her that, back when she was alive. It was her philosophy that one should only strongly dislike somebody. Peyton always tried to do what she thought would have made her mother proud, but in this case she couldn't. She hated Dan. She hated everything he stood for and everything he had done. His only redeeming quality was that he had helped in bringing her Nathan.  
  
Besides, she had treated him just as badly. She snapped at him, and yelled back just as loudly. She took out her frustrations at the world on him, and he let her. Because he understood her, too. Maybe he didn't show it as much as he should have, and maybe he never appreciated her artwork enough, but he understood her. And he loved her back.  
  
In a way, their relationship fluctuated. It had its ups and its downs. When it was bad, it was bad, but when it was good, oh god, was it good. Even if it hadn't seemed like it to the rest of the world, they had really been in love. Madly, desperately, dramatically in love.  
  
But then things had started to change. Dan began pushing him harder, the team started to depend on him, and Lucas had come along. Lucas. When all was said and done, he was really the reason behind their break up. And for the first time she could remember, Peyton resented Lucas for that.  
  
The truth was, she missed Nathan. She missed his eyes, and his lips, and his hands. She missed their fights, and their hissy fits. She missed their passion. She missed them. And you know what? She wanted him back. 


End file.
